Suicide Awareness: Starting the conversation could save a life.

There are some words we are comfortable saying out loud. Stress. Anxiety. Depression. Grief.

Suicide is harder.

We lower our voices. We avoid the word. We worry that asking someone about suicide might somehow make things worse. But when it comes to suicide prevention, silence isn’t protective. Conversation can be.

One of the most common concerns I hear is, “What if I ask someone if they’re thinking about suicide and put the idea in their head?” Research has consistently shown that asking someone directly about suicide does not cause suicidal thoughts. Instead, it can open a door for someone who may desperately need permission to talk.

You don’t need special training to ask.

“You haven’t seemed like yourself lately. Are you okay?”

And if you’re truly concerned, it is okay to be direct: “Are you thinking about suicide?”

Then listen.

Resist the urge to immediately fix it, lecture or remind the person of everything they have to live for. Statements like “But you have so much to be thankful for” may be well intended, but they can make someone feel even more misunderstood.

Emotional pain doesn’t disappear simply because someone has a good family, a successful career or people who love them.

There can be warning signs: withdrawing from others, talking about hopelessness or being a burden, giving away important possessions, increased alcohol or drug use or significant changes in mood, sleep or behavior. Sometimes, though, there are few outward signs at all.

That’s why checking on each other matters.

If someone tells you they are thinking about suicide, take them seriously. Ask whether they have a plan. If you believe they are in immediate danger, stay with them and help them reach emergency or crisis services.

And if you are the person struggling, I want you to know something I’ve learned from years of sitting across from people during some of the hardest moments of their lives:

A terrible moment can convince you that you have a terrible life.

Those are not the same thing.

You don’t have to figure out the rest of your life tonight. You don’t have to know how everything is going to get better. Sometimes the next step is simply telling another human being, “I’m not okay.”

In the United States, you can call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. If you are in immediate danger, call 911 or go to the nearest emergency department.

Suicide prevention isn’t only the responsibility of counselors, doctors and crisis workers.

It belongs to all of us.

Sometimes prevention begins with something as ordinary as noticing that someone seems different and having the courage to ask:

“How are you really doing?”

Then staying long enough to hear the answer.

💜 Until next time- take care of yourself and those around you.